A totally necessary ‘analysis’ of Microsoft’s Xbox Live rebranding
A scientific, mathematical, and literary dissection of the move to Xbox network
Rebranding Xbox Live: the capital letter issue
You notice this? It was Xbox Live and now it’s… Xbox network. Live to network. Look again:
Wheredidthe capital letter go? Who took it? Does it count as kidnapping? Should I engage the authorities? Do I need to blink in morse code?
Generally,title caseis for fools and cowards, but this alteration of ‘Live’ to ‘network’ feels wrong, it’s as though something beautiful and important has been wrenched away from me, fromus,even.
And all I have to say about that is nay. Or, should I say, Nay.
The rebrand to Xbox network: more letters = better
While we may have lost a capital letter in the rebranding, there is something we gained: letters. Now, I’m not a scientist, but I do know thatMORE = BETTER.You can’t disagree with that.
Now we’ve got that bit out the way, let me slip into my mathematician robe…
That’s a75% length increase. This isn’t a number that you could just make up, this isreal maths. We’re in the future.
Live vs. network: what does it mean?
We’ve got scientific, now it’s time to get literary.
Currently, it appears that the rebrand of Xbox Live to Xbox network is neutral, as each name had a positive point in its favor, but that’s all going to change. Now, I don’t want to jump to conclusions, but I think rebranding to “network” over “Live” shows that Microsoft is intent on turning us from independent, living and breathing creatures into merely tiny nodes of a giant infrastructure so it can use our bodies to power huge machines whose sole purpose seems to be farming people?
Or was thatThe Matrix? Anyway, tell me one good thing involved with a “network?” LinkedIn? My point is proven.
Conclusion
Microsoft has rebranded Xbox Live to Xbox network. That’s a fact.
What we don’t know is whether this is part of a dastardly conspiracy to control our minds and crush our spirits, or is just a way of making the Xbox ecosystem easier to understand. Actually, that’s a lie — I do know. It’s the former.
Story byCallum Booth
Callum Booth is a freelance journalist with over a decade of experience. Previously, he was the Managing Editor of TNW, where his reporting(show all)Callum Booth is a freelance journalist with over a decade of experience. Previously, he was the Managing Editor of TNW, where his reporting was cited widely, including in VICE, the FT, and the BBC.
Callum’s writing has appeared in The Verge, The Daily Telegraph, Time Out, and many more. He covers the full spectrum of technology, with a particular focus on how it shapes our daily lives. And a lot of regulation stuff too.
Outside of work, Callum’s an avid bookworm, a Fisherman’s Friends addict, and resolutely unshaven. Follow him on Twitter @CallumBooth or visit www.callumbooth.net.
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